Determining what to do next is always a challenge. The number of options facing me was bewildering. Even more bewildering were the implications, the consequences of each of those options. Confronting what was coming next forced me to take a long, cold, dispassionate look at where my priorities lay, at what I really wanted. What I discovered - much to my own chagrin - is I seemed to be better equipped to come up with what I don't want. I could list reams and reams and reams of options I don't want. Yet when I projected myself into a space of total freedom, a space in which I could have anything I want, I was surprised noticing it's harder to come up with what I really want than it is to come up with what I don't want. I don't know why it's this way. Yet it's clear to me it's this way. At least, this is how it occurs for me. So being it's all I knew to do, I continued isolating what I don't want. Some time during that process it dawned on me what I was really doing was distinguishing and honoring what lay behind all my don't wants. I realized I was actually distinguishing and honoring the priority of a third rail in my life. The third rail, of course, is the power source for metro trains. Go where they will, unless they have contact with their third rail, there's no power for metro trains. |
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