Gee! I hope you get that ... I was sharing with one of my coaches about a negativity bordering on a total unworkability within a group of people I know, participate with, and love. At about that time, I was also making travel plans to go visit with them. Given the triumph of transformation over circumstance, unworkability is never an obstacle ... except when it is. This was one of those occasions when it was. My coach said to me "Here's my two cents worth Laurence: it's your call whether you don't go or whether you go ... and given the way things are, if it were me I wouldn't go.". I reflected on her coaching. Just because she was one of my closest, most trusted advisors doesn't mean I accepted everything she said blindly without consideration. Soon, outside of her advice, I got in touch with that I didn't want to go given the way things were (in other words, my coach was confirming what I already knew). So I canceled my travel plans. It was the right choice. I was at peace with it. It was alright. Months passed uneventfully. Then one day I got that if I could allow the negativity, the total unworkability to be whatever it was, without trying to fix it, without trying to change it when I was away from it, then I could equally allow it to be whatever it was without trying to fix it and without trying to change it when I was with it. I have an undeniable affinity with that group of people - that is to say I have an undeniable affinity with and I love each of them individually. I noticed in spite of the pervasive unworkability, I'd never lost sight of who each of them really are, and who each of them really are for me. As soon as I got that, I made new travel plans. Although nothing had changed, I could be with them after all. I went. It was great. In fact it was probably greater than if I had gone when I'd originally planned to go, and simply tolerated the unworkability. |
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