Transformation ie being in a conversation about transformation, is a
distinction.
Your first moment of transformation, that moment out of time when you
stopped being your act and became yourSelf for the first time, happened
as the result of an act of creation. To say that more
rigorously,
when you first experienced who you really are as not your act, it
happened because you created who you really are as distinct from your
act.
When you became truly alive and stepped away from merely existing, from
only being about making it, from getting by, from surviving, you
created that. So if transformation fades or goes away, guess what? You
stopped creating it. That's all.
Transformation isn't your birthright. You are not born with it. Yes,
you are born with the possibility of it. But you are not
born with it. If you get it and you don't ongoingly create it, it goes
away. Really it does. That's its nature. In fact it only lives in you
creating it. There is no other place it occurs.
If you listen to enough people describing their personal experiences of
transformation, you start to notice that while each of them may share
their experience in slightly different terms, there's a common thread
running through all of them which sounds like the end of identifying
with self, and becoming Self.
What's the difference?
"self" is who you mistake yourself to be and believe, your act, your
ego, your strong suit etc and all that makes up the way you have
constructed yourself in order to survive your life.
"Self" is really all there is, space, total consciousness, who you
really are and who I really am and who Werner really is (we are one as
Self), context, and if I could whisper this, I would also add the word
"God"
but I suspect that could get us all into trouble because it's not that
Self is
God
but rather that
God
is Self. That's a loaded conversation which you should treat as
carefully as if you were carrying a stick of dynamite next to a naked
flame.
The trouble it could get us into is twofold.
One is whenever the G-word comes up, the speaking of it as well as the
listening of it is fraught with belief and goeswith being
right about it and having a point of view about it (as
Alan Watts
may have said). Or, to couch it in more classical terms, there is a
tendency toward righteousness whenever
God
occurs in a conversation, both spoken and listened. We've all seen the
movie so many times before. We love offering our critiques and our
opinions of all its scenes and images. But when was the last time you
watched the movie and distinguished the screen on which all its scenes
and images dance?
Two is who you are simply is who you are and has no cause for quarrel
with who you mistake yourself to be and believe. Righteousness comes
from who you mistake yourself to be and believe in order to reassert
who you mistake yourself to be and believe. And the trouble with
that is being right about
God
effectively kills off any real experience of
God.
During a recent conversation with Werner I heard him develop two
powerful distinctions: the world to word fit, and the
terministic screen. Not de-terministic screen. It sounds
like that but it isn't. A terministic screen comprises the
terms, words, phrases, and sentences which keep people
in a conversation or out of it.
In one of those bibles (I can't remember which one) it says "In the
beginning was the Word.".
God
has a world to word fit. "Let there be light!" ... and there was light.
Adam, a guy without a past, got to name the animals. He had a world to
word fit.
Naming is not
cheap.
The way you name something determines the world in which it shows up
for people. The way you speak something determines the world in which
it shows up for people. Consider the possibility that who you really
are is constituted in language, that who you are is really a set of
conversations albeit not a limited set of conversations nor a fixed set
of conversations. The world to word fit in your speaking is where
God
as Self shows up. The way you speak
God
as Self is a terministic screen which keeps people in the conversation
God
as Self, or not.